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Thursday, July 9, 2020

On Cancelling People

When Amy Cooper was videoed in Central Park saying to Chris Cooper, "I'm going to tell them I am being threatened by a black man," I kept wondering, WHAT did he say to her that triggered this reaction? I finally learned it today when I went searching the internet. In the statement from Amy, she says, "When Chris began offering treats to my dog and confronted me in an area where there was no one else nearby and said, 'You're not going to like what I'm going to do next,' I assumed we were being threatened when all he had intended to do was record our encounter on his phone."
Here is the summary that was reported over and over in the media: "A Black man asked a white woman to leash her dog in Central Park, as rules required. She refused. Then she called the police to say she was being threatened." And regarding the moments before filming began, "After he asked her to leash the cocker spaniel, the two exchanged words."
After that we got to hear in detail all that she said on the emergency call. (I assume everyone reading this has watched that video, and maybe some interviews with Chris Cooper.) She had assumed that what he was "going to do next" would be physically harmful to her because he was a black man? And she chose to use her whiteness to threaten him without bothering to communicate with him, human to human.

But I was like, "Well WHAT did he say to her?" Not that it would erase the racism that was plain to see, but why was this not in the news report? In an effort to remain connected to our common humanity I felt we deserved to know the whole story and when I learned what he said (according to her), I gained a glimpse of what could have put her into the fear response, albeit a racist one.
She has lost her job, home and reputation and seems to have become a pariah.

I heard a journalist yesterday say that we have a "cancel-society." We cancel people, kind of like a Black Mirror episode. Kevin Spacey, for example has been "canceled." Are we going to demonize and erase people to the extent they cannot actually be in society any longer? I want us to have regenerative processes for healing and learning in our society. I want us to stop throwing people away on one hand while we do the good work for justice and fairness on the other.

True nonviolent communication calls us to heal together, not put a distance with those that are harming and needing to grow... from what I read, she sounds open to growing.
I celebrate that Chris Cooper himself is open to forgiveness and reconnecting; in another article: "Asked if he’d accept her apology, Christian Cooper told CNN he would 'if it’s genuine and if she plans on keeping her dog on a leash in the Ramble going forward.'"
Excerpts from news article found here.