August 2014
I landed back home after 8 months of traveling. It started with quitting my job and then driving to St. Louis for 2013 Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays... then to Costa Rica for 10 days over New Year's with my beautiful niece, Andrea. Then I went to India at the end of January for 4 amazing months, I topped this off with a 2-week trip to Thailand. I made a plan far ahead of time to visit friends and family on US east (New York, Massachusetts, New Jersey and Virginia) coast for three weeks when I returned. I figured, since I have time and will be coming into the east coast from Asia, I could reconnect to them on my way home.
But I was in a mental state that was unlike I had experienced before... I had not been working, not driving, not cooking, not shopping... just being and exploring. I was alone a lot traveling in Asia, and now being with people constantly since arriving in the US was a challenge, as I was visiting old friends, cousins, aunt, sister and niephews. I was going cuckoo not having time and space to integrate my experiences from the India journey while visiting people who were going at full speed in their own lives, happy to have a visitor to bring into their own world... but I wasn't ready to go into others' worlds. I wanted to talk about my experiences, and I wanted to write. I wanted to go into my cave, or share with a person who was really curious about what happened for me on my journey.
I was still living out of the backpack and now suddenly in high-drive visiting-mode with people I had not seen in some years, I was so happy to see these people who care for me so much, but I was having a hard time taking care of myself, and under the happiness to connect with my loved ones, I felt a measure of grief, confusion, withdrawal, and loneliness.
A beautiful moment happened when I went home to St. Louis after all that traveling... Mother was so ecstatic to see me. I felt like a 4-year old again, feeling her love, relief, and adoration when she picked me up at the airport. She was beside herself with excitement and hugs, like a child herself, letting her emotions totally show. She took me home and offered me food, candies, drinks and comfy places to sit. She was dying to hear all about my trip and see all the pictures. She was so happy to have me home, safe and sound. Then my sister Margaret came home and she squealed and hugged me so hard. She was equally excited to see me, and to learn of my experiences, she couldn't wait! I felt so loved and adored, it was such a sweet homecoming!
I was so surprised that I really wanted and needed this. I needed to feel welcomed home and, I guess, to be celebrated? Margaret mentioned that maybe I felt celebrated when I told her how it felt...
I watched Kanika's family welcome her home when she went to her parents' house in Panchkula near Chandigargh. They had everything ready for the important guests! Kanika, her husband Patrick, son Watson, and me, friend Kathleen. Bedrooms were perfectly prepared, and amazing foods cooked to welcome hungry travelers. All attentions and affections were poured on Kanika and her family. There was no mistake she was the most important person in this moment, having been gone, and now welcomed back to the nest. She was celebrated and loved! They all wanted to know about her life and how she was doing. I so admired and enjoyed this adoring, welcoming energy. And she poured gifts upon her parents, brother, sister-in-law and niece. What a great time they were having in their reunion, like Christmas.
It is such a beautiful thing to celebrate a person. I think this is one reason I do love birthdays. I like to sing to people on their birthdays, on the phone or in person. I want to be more conscious of celebrating others. It is a beautiful thing, to celebrate each other!
I want to celebrate people when they make big life decisions, when they return home after a long or intense absence, when they go through a big life change. We used to have more ceremony in our lives, to mark these important moments of change, return, and departure. I believe we can re-integrate those traditions, or make new traditions to be conscious of each other's growth and process with love and attention!
